


Night Out with The Lads™

by LordDootium



Series: The Moron Wars [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Anakin Skywalker is a Lightweight, By clone standards, Gen, Off-Duty Clones, Shore Leave, Supportive Commander Fox, The Clone Wars - Freeform, The boys go out to get wasted, at least, bad at tags, its almost 1 am, star wars crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24551767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordDootium/pseuds/LordDootium
Summary: Rex asks Anakin to come along with the rest of Torrent to 79's for a night of fun.He wasn't prepared for this.
Series: The Moron Wars [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1774501
Kudos: 92





	Night Out with The Lads™

-Star Wars: the Moron Wars-

Part 1: Night Out with The Lads™

. . . .

Anakin Skywalker, if he was being completely honest, had about kriffing had it. It was bad enough being burdened with the task of being the so-called “Chosen One” since he was initiated into the Jedi Order. But now the galaxy was burning itself down, the Chancellor was trying to be some kind of father figure (it wasn't working that well) and the council had decided that he, of all people, was a good candidate to have a padawan. (Not that he was complaining or anything, Ahsoka was pretty cool. When she wasn't running off on her own, of course.)

Sometimes he wonders if half this shit wouldn't have happened if Qui-Gon had lived.

And that's why he was here now, in a gunship with Rex, Jesse and some other members of Torrent on their way to 79s, the clone bar he’s heard plenty of stories from Echo about Fives’ drunken mishaps. 

And should anything go wrong, he could always just pin it on Obi-Wan for telling him to get some down time.

“General?” Rex asked, shaking Anakin out of his stupor. He realised that not only had they landed, but he had been staring blankly out the open gunship doors for longer than he wanted to know.

“Im fine Rex. At least I will be once I get a drink.”

“Ehehe, Yeah! Now that's the spirit, general!” Fives said, giving Anakin a slap on the back, startling him ever so slightly, an open bottle present in his other hand.

“What? Best to get started early,” he said at Rex’s glare, as he jumped off the ship and into the bar, Echo trailing behind.

Stepping into the bar alongside the rest of the present clones, Anakin was overwhelmed by the loud as hell, bass-heavy techno music coming from the speakers.

“Don't worry sir, you get used to it. Most of the boys like it, anyhow.” Rex said, as they made their way to an empty booth. Jesse had tore off, making his way towards the dance floor.

“HA! New record for how long until he ditched us,” Kix said. 

“Why's that? Some friends of his here?” Anakin asked.

“He always comes to try his luck with the ladies,” Rex started, rolling his eyes.

Anakin just stared in a newfound awe and respect at the trooper’s desperation as he watched Jesse approach a particular group, “And the success rate is?...”

“15 strikeouts so far. This month, anyways. Think he’ll keep the streak up, Kix?”

“You kidding? He’ll hit 20 by the end of the month, just you see.”

Anakin shifted in his seat, a little off put by the drastic environment then he was used to. “So, you guys ready to order some drinks now?”

“Yes you are, general.” Rex said with a sly grin, tossing a coule credits his way.

“Sorry sir, first-timers always buy.”

Anakin sighed, scooped up the money, and walked over to the bar. Well, “walked” is a bit generous, as he had to first stumble his way through the mostly drunked masses of clones and other assorted military personnel and civilians, almost knocking a few people over on the way. Once he reached the bar,  _ karking finally _ , he thought, he waved down a bartender, an ithorian in a clean shirt but grease-stained, dirty black aporn.

“Sooo, how much can this get me?” Anakin said, letting the pooled credits from what Rex gave him and his own stash splash onto the bar. The bartender counted them in place, then swept them away under the counter somewhere. He ducked aside for a moment, then set down two large 12-packs of alcoholic  _ something _ with a heavy thud on the counter. He gave him a nod, then wandered off to another part of the bar before Anakin could say anything else.

“Uhh, thanks.” He tried to say over the music, but could tell he wasn't heard, as he picked up the surprisingly heavy cases in each hand.

“Drinking with Torrent tonight, General?” Anakin heard from his other side, turning to be met with a clone in red Coruscant guard armor.

“Oh, hey Fox. Yeah, first timers by drinks for the table, apparently...” Anakin said, mentellay scolding himself as he remembered damn well that smirk Rex had when he first asked if he wanted to join them.

“Then here, you’ll need this.” Fox said dryly, his usual dead expression unchanging as he lodged a large bottle of some purple liquor under his arm, and then downed the almost full glass he already had with him.

“Look, I appreciate it, but I don't think-”

“The Torrent boys drink like they’ve never had, seen, or ever even heard of water, one of Jango’s less desirable traits. What you just bought wasn't even half what they go through in a night.” Fox said, as he saved down a server and refilled his glass. “Trust me, Skywalker. You’ll thank me for this.” He said, patting his cheek as if he was a mere child, and walked off back into the crowd, Anakin left in a state of confusion as to what just happened. 

“Eh, must have been set up by Rex to say that to scare me off,” he muttered to himself, wobbling his way back to their booth.

. . . .

It had not, in fact, been a scare tactic. Not to say he wasn't scared of just how much booze the clones could take, that is. Before tonight, Anankin had only seen the members of Torrent Company drink a glass, maybe two when onboard the  _ Resolute _ , and the occasional sanctioned passing of the flask during a heated battle, (that he may or may not have brought along in the first place) but he never could of imagined Fox had been  _ so right. _ Admittedly, he hadn’t helped by his failed attempts to keep up with his troopers, if anything encouraging them on further. During the shuttle ride back to the Jedi Temple, (because even he knew it wasn't smart to fly like this,) he couldn't help but feel he had gotten hammered by simply being in proximity to them.

Thankfully, Ahsoka was there waiting for him in the temple hangar bay, running up to the gunship looking concerned.

“Master, is everything alright? Most of your messages to me have been, well, gibberish. What happened?” She asked, as Anakin used her to keep himself upright, as they began the long walk back up to the living quarters of the temple.

“Snips, promise me something.” he said in an strangely pained tone that threw off Ahsoka, “Remind me to never drink again,” was all he could say, before he stumbled off to the side, and began to throw up the night’s drinks and bar snacks.

“I- I’ll call for a janitorial droid,” Ahsoka said with a sigh, keeping herself turned away.

. . . .

“So, how did it go?” Appo asked the returning captain and clones as they wandered back to their barracks for the night.

“Eh, nothing too exciting. But we did manage to pressure the General into downing a full bottle of Nabooian win, the real top-shelf stuff. Not quite sure how he got it anyhow.” Rex said, stopping at the Sergeant’s desk to talk, his inebriated compatriots stumbling off to the bunk rooms.

“Although, we all learned something very interesting about general Skywalker tonight.”

“Go on then, do tell.” Appo said with more interest than Rex thinks he's ever heard before.

“Well, to be blunt about it. Skywalker’s a bit of a karking lightweight.”

**Author's Note:**

> For reference, just imagine eurobeat blaring during the scenes in the bar. But like, Europe doesn't exist in star wars, so I couldn't actually call it that.
> 
> X-Post from my FFdotN account.


End file.
